Love and Marriage. A Blind Institution?

With a cup of cold ‘kaapi’ to beat the sweltering heat in Bombay, my mind churns along with the air conditioner and with the conversation I had earlier in the day with my mother’s family friend who came to visit us today.

Draped in the colours of a widow; sporting a short, rather funky for her age, haircut and with wrinkled fingers, protectively holding on to her peg of whisky; I mistook her for someone with modern ideologies until the following words spilled out from her mouth and washed away all the new found respect I had for a woman, who proudly lives independently, in a remote city, half way across the country, at the age of 77.

“Darling! You have a MBA degree. Do you know other such educated, ‘ripe’ Bengali girls for a possible match for my grandson?”

I choked on the water I was drinking, as I processed the question. What proceeded was my face producing its unique smile and I replied with a firm 'NO'. No ‘ripe’ friend of mine is coming anywhere near her pansy grandson who gets his grandmother to be his life partner pimp. I was about to retort with a more subtle but equally rude statement when my mother, being my mother, recognized the afore mentioned smile and quickly changed the topic to marital scandals in the family.

Which, in turn, reminded me of the conversation my aunt wanted to have with me, which she began with ‘Marriage is an institution….’

Shaadi.com; SecondShaadi.com; Marriage Counseling; Self-proclaimed Matchmakers; Horoscope Matching; Matrimonial Advertisements, Pre-nups; Divorce Settlements; Infidelity; Impotency; Wife Beaters; Rapists; Sexless Marriages; Same Sex Marriages; Nagging Mother-in-laws; Child Custody Battles…This unfortunately is what constitutes the institution of Marriage.

What happened to keeping things simple?

Like just loving each other and supporting each other and being companions for the rest of your lives.

I honestly believe in the above mentioned fact. I also believe in one more fact.

‘Hubby-to-be! Keep your mouth shut and your credit card ready!”

:-)

Xoxo
P

Travails of The Indian Rail

Being the ‘Artful Dodger’ involves hoisting/carrying luggage while squeezing through a sea of human flesh and dodging the occasional sleazy grab/pinch or the elusive pickpocket.

Requiring Potty Training involves having to squat in the train ‘toylate’ perfectly without toppling over or touching ANYTHING which is an art by itself.

Practicing the art of Meditation involves deep breathing, while resisting the urge to kick the talkative, over smart Bihari vomiting his views on the upcoming IPL.

Snapping at the loud, talkative group at 3 AM in the morning.

Being well equipped with a good read, a couple of good movies on the laptop but more importantly Gelusil, Fresh Ones, and Lifebuoy Hand Sanitizer.

Turning a deaf ear to the symphony of snores emitted from the ‘dead-to-the-world’ co passengers.

Super strong stomach muscles helps to keep dismal train food down, while pretending not to notice a co passenger’s protruding, pussing (about to pop out any second and land on the afore mentioned dismal food) horn.

Realizing in astonishment that people still purchase Bollywood movie cassettes.

Trying to remain astonished even though the annoying, leering male co passenger will blast the damn music at the maximum possible decibel that his rather ancient portable player will cough out.

Day dreaming and pretending the lower side berth of the train compartment is a hut complete with a water bottle holder, an electrical socket point and a gigantic window overlooking the beautiful countryside landscapes.

Recollecting that another word for train compartment is also ‘bogey’.

Enjoying the thrill of hopping off onto every obscure station that the train stops at including one that is called ‘Igatpuri’.

Surviving acute and newly acquired hunger pangs by snacking on junk food and proceeding towards complaining of a stomach ache.

Happy (smirk) Journey!